Fading?

For those of you who wonder why I haven't posted nor talked about Pilgrim for the last two monts, or probably more, here's my update.
Prepare for disappointment and dullness.
I went to a life-changing trip for three weeks. Abroad, far away from both my homeland and Pilgrimage. And man, alot has happened since then.
I experienced quite an unwordly occurence during my trip away from Pilgrim: a guy confessed to me. Wow, since I'm definitely not a girl next door, stuff like this is pretty new to me and it's weird to suddenly be labeled a heartbreaker by a bunch of foreigners. But the good thing is, it was pretty low key and this huy,15, had been nothing but super nice to me. I guess we made ourselves good friends-we definitely parted that way.
As for my feelings toward Pilgrim, it gradually cooled once I went back from my trip. Perhaps I'm a little bothered by how calmly he reacts to the love declaration 15 dropped on me. (yes, I told him) He should've been at least a little agitated, you know. But he didn't, still as reserved as ever. And at that moment I thought to myself, this would never end. I gotta end this as fast and as painless as I could.
I'm not sure if it's painless in his part, if he DOES have no feelings for me as he claimed, he sure won't bother agonizing over my giving a cold shoulder. But otherwise it'd be extremely painful for anyone, being ignored like that after previously corresponding with each other with such intensity... but frankly at this point I'm too over it to care. He grew tiresome on me. If a fifteen year old could dare to make a move after only a week of knowing each other, why wouldn't he do anything after 7 years? 5 years? 3 years? 3 months? This baffles me and leads me to conclude, he just doesn't care. All he cares about is how to make me and everyone else afraid of his idea of God.
I don't need him.
But I do feel bad because I could sense his attempts of making a convo with me. Problem is, I'm not interested and he made it very clear at a time that I need not to response to him if I don't feel like it. So I'll just let him eat his own words.
A cold-hearted b*tch, that's what I am. Never seen myself as a heartbreaker. Pretty cool and awful at the same time.
And meanwhile, I got myself a new bro after the trip. I love bros, I got two so far and these guys are pretty alike. So having a very distinct new one is awesomely refreshing. The most startling difference would be; this new bro isn't a geek. In fact, he's technologically challenged. Haha great taunting material there. Besides he lives in a different country which makes attachment the last thing for me to worry about! How great is that? I say, fuck crushes and long live platonic bros!
Although you oughtta know I'm not really sure if I can keep this new bro a bro, you know? But I have to, as a friend of mine actually confides in me that she's into my bro.
I smell trouble. But I can handle this, I swear.

As for Pilgrim, I'll let him reflect in Pilgrimage. (He went back home twice during my absence from posting, one before and one after my trip. Both attempts on making a convo ended up in utter mess. I tried during his first homecoming and simply turned away during the second. You know why.)

Since I currently have no love interest, I should be off posting for awhile, probably I'll only fill up some past gaps between Pilgrim and I but that's about it. And if my feelings for him do resurface (the odds are in favor) I'll keep you informed, alright?

Sucked out of life, Edge